Here's your Update. Heh

Sorry guys, things have been kinda busy around here.

Some of you may have heard that BTSAM's deployment has been moved up. Icky.

On a lighter note, we're getting married.

July 12.
I was hoping to get a chance to call everyone and find out if they are going to be able to make it out here before posting it on here, but I decided that an explanation was needed as to why I haven't posted in so long. So that's why. I've been planning a wedding. It's gonna be really small, just so that we are married before he gets deployed. We were planning it for after my mother's wedding, but that has kinda changed now, because BTSAM will be gone before that.

That is why I am going to be calling people and see if any of my family can make it out here. If not we are going to have two small ceremonies, (just vows and rings) and two small receptions, and maybe a big wedding after he come home.

Which that gives us time to save up money.

On another note.
Jarrid is doing fine. He weighs almost 7 lbs now! 6 lbs 10 oz last that I knew off. He's eating like it's going out of style.
And me? I weigh a whopping 134 lbs!
OMG! I know fat huh?
Nah, I know it's not fat. My goal is maybe higher 120's, I want to not look like a twig. I want to look healthy. Which I do now, but I want to be fit too. So I'm working out about every two days, I'm not going to push myself at all because I don't want to hurt anything. We do go to the gym at least twice a day. I just waste away in the hot tub all the other times. But we went into the steam room tonight. HOLY COW! Talk about hot! My nose and lips were on fire!

But yeah, that's most of the update right now. Nothing really too exciting going on right now, just being plain busy.

oh and we got new cell phones. If I have your number I will call you with it. If not talk to my mother about acquiring it from her.

So I changed a few things on my blog. No much, but take a look around.

pretty snazzy huh?

there were some other things that I wanted to add, but then it just looked to big and cluttered and I'm sure no one would have noticed the bottom.

I found this quote and I love it!


There are also some icons that I found that love, I changed my profile Icon to my favorite.

If you can't read it it says:
You know it's true love when you trade diamonds for dogtags.


lol love it!

Sorry guys.

I know I haven't posted in along time.
LTSAM likes to stay up till midnight now. Tonight is the first night and I'm *shockingly* not tired. So I'll post.

I'm feeling alot better, I still have a cough, but it's only after I eat, or drink. oddly enough.

we got a gym membership! YAY!
We each have a personal trainer too, it comes with the member ship. We each met with our trainer every week. I met mine today and she's really nice. She started me out on a really easy workout to help me get back into shape, heres what I do.

I do a back exercise with a 9 lb body bar, bent over to help me tighten my back muscles even more. 15 of those. then I do 15 crunches with a squishy ball between my knees which I hold up. I do 15 reps on the military press at 20 lbs. then these things called russian twists with a medicine ball. 20 mins on the Arch trainer to work my legs and help move my hips back into place, and then 20 min on a stairmaster. Then she wants me to start taking the yoga classes to work on flexability and atleast once a week take an x-bike class and an aqua class to keep my tendonitis at bay. then I can take all the dance classes I want! They have a dance step class, a hiphop class and a Zumba class which I guess is african dancing. so I'm excited and can't wait to start working out. but now I'm tired so I'm going to bed.

HAPPY EASTER!

Scrapbooking.

So I've added a few more pages to Jarrid scrapbook. So not only does he have a baby book, but he has a scrapbook too!

........

Last night I learned that my "cold" was just allergies, because BTSAM was suffering the same way. But then I woke up with morning. I'm not even gonna go into what I looked like cause it was UGLY. Not to mention I sounded like a dying horse. The cough has gotten worse and I'm still gonna keep my distance from Jarrid just to be safe.

I'll give it a few more days and see if it gets better or worse.

Dude.

Not going to lie EVERYBODY is pissing me off. I just want to scream at everyone.

I feel like shit. I want to swallow a shotgun I'm so sick. But Do I get a day off to rest and maybe try to get better? No.

The Little Tough Army Girls are on school vacation this week.
oh joy.
Their mother has to work all week so BTAM offered to babysit a few weeks ago. Little did she know that her baby was going to be sick, throwing up all over the place with a horrible cough, and the doctors wont give her anything for it because it's just a cough. So guess where we go everyday when BTSAM get's home? Take a wild guess.
I wanna know why we're trying so hard to keep LTSAM from getting sick, and yet we bring him, and give him to everyone that is sick, why don't we just throw him into a pool of aids while we're at it. Kill all the birds with one stone. Put him in the hospital for life.
And on top of it. I'm now sick. fantastic. The only person who is home to take care of him during the day, and I get sick. C'mon LTAG we're basically coughing up their lungs on everyone's floors and here comes the brilliant idea; Let's give them the premature baby to hold and cough all over!

So now I'm sick. I can't even hold my own baby, because I don't want to get him sick. Which might I add is already happening. He's developed a cough which makes him cry (I don't give a rat's ass if "Babies cough") If babies "just cough", why did he just start after everyone in the world who was sick held him?

That's just a few of the things that are pissing me off.
All I want to do is relax and try not to get sick, I just wanted to sleep in (Which I could have because LTSAM decided he was going to sleep in today but nope, because A LTAG decided that she was going to crawl into bed with me and i just wasn't in the mood. It's school vacation! Why don't kids sleep in until noon?! I know I did. And so I got out of bed and went out into the living room, after announcing to LTAG that I did not feel good AT ALL and that she could get on the computer and play Nancy drew, I went and laid down on the couch with LTSAM in his bouncer next to me.

I dont know about you, but when someone says they don't feel good isn't that usually a big sign that means "Leave me the fuck alone." ?

Guess not.

She played Nancy Drew for like a hour. I was almost asleep when she came and climbed onto the couch wedging herself between the back of the couch and myself. I just kinda ignored it, These girls are really big on cuddling and as long as she didn't breath on me I might not throw up. But no, Every five minutes it was one question after the other. and the one question that pissed me off the most.
"You still don't feel good?"
What the hell am I suppose to say?
"No I feel like a million bucks! I got all of about 2 hours of sleep last night, my throat hurts, I'm coughing my lungs onto the floor, my eyes are all itchy and they are burning and on top of that I keep getting hot flashes. Yup I feel like I could run a marathon!"

My patience meter is on empty. I think the only people I can be patient with are probably, BTSAM, Really Big Tough Retired Army Man, BTAM, And Katie (who's so sick she just wants to scream at everyone and call them "BAD!")
Anyone else I just want to murder.
So I need some sleep. So what? I couldn't sleep if I wanted to.

Oh and to top things all off. I'm trying to be nice. That's why I'm venting on here. I will let the stupid questions come (to an extent) I will go to bed with everyone tonight and not sleep at all. I will wake up in the morning probably worse off then I was today, and I will put myself in a plastic bubble so that I wont get my baby sick and I will rest tomorrow.
Oh wait no I wont, because the BTAGs are spending the night tonight. And they will be up at 7:30 digging through the cupboards for something to eat and slamming shit closed and not caring about who is still sleeping and coming into my room to wake me up to ask me a stupid ass question like if they can watch T.v. or if they can have something to eat.
If that happens I will say no to every question they ask me. Cause I feel like being a bitch. And I'm gunna be one.

Cause I just don't give a shit anymore.

Army wedding vows.

I thought these were cute. i filled in the blanks cause it was confusing with them.


Dear family and friend, we are gathered here today in the sight of God and the Department of the Army to witness this exchange of vows and to see the love that these dedicated, loving people have for one another.
I, BTSAM, take Tough Future Army Wife, as your Family Member, to dwell together in so far as the Department of the Army will permit?”

“Wilt thou love her, comfort her via the Postal Service or over the telephone, make sure she knows where the commissary, PX, clinic and the church are and what time she is scheduled to use the laundry room the day she arrives, wherever you are stationed?”

“Wilt thou attempt to tell her more than 24 hours in advance that you will be leaving for two weeks, beginning the next morning? This especially applies to the years you will live in a foreign country!”

“Wilt thou, , take this soldier as thy wedded husband, knowing that he is depending upon you to be the perfect (well, almost) Army Wife, running the household as you see fit and being nice to the Commander’s Wife (even when it is hard to)? Further, you understand that your life with your husband (little that you may have together) will not be normal, that you may have to explain to your children, not once but twice and more often in the same day, that mothers do have husbands, that children do have daddies, and that the picture of the man on the refrigerator is not the milkman, but the same individual who tucks them in at 2200 hours, long after they are asleep. This soldier is their daddy, who loves then very, very much”

"Wilt thou love, respect and wait for him, preparing his favorite meals when he does come home and freezing them when he doesn’t? When he is gone wilt thou send him all his favorite cookies and pictures of yourself and the children so he can remember what you look like? When you are separated on your anniversaries (which will happen more often than not) you will remember this special day and celebrate it on the closest day possible to the actual date. And last but not least, put on the outside of the door his ‘WELCOME HOME’ sign when he is due to arrive.”

“I,BTSAM , take thee
TFAW, as my independent wife from 1900 to 2200 hours or as long as allowed by my Commanding Officer (subject to change without notice) for better or worse, earlier or later, near or far, and promise to look at the pictures you send me, maybe not when they get to me in the field, but before I turn out the lights. I will also send you a letter if time permits, and if not, to somehow, someway make the time. I will also remember this special day and will try to telephone you somehow, someway on the anniversaries we are separated.”


tee hee...well I smell I loaded diaper.

must change


P.S
ARMY WIVES
IS OFFICIALLY COMING BACK ON IN JUNE!!! YAY!!!

alright, alright, already....I know.

O.K.
So maybe I'm a little over protective. I've gathered this, but I can't help it. I try not to be. But I can't help it.

What brought on this sudden realization?
A few things that have happened over the past few days. I think it's what my mother said and it's hormones just trying to get back to their normal levels.

I know I've been over protective. I don't need anyone else to tell me this.

So what if I'm not ready to leave him with a baby-sitter? I'm sure it will be a little while before I'm comfortable to do that. I mean come on, I had to fax a paper for BTSAM the other day and I had been at his mothers all day long and it made absolutely no sense for me to pack him up and put him in the car just to go fax something, when Tough Army Mom (BTSAM's mother) was perfectly capable of watching him. I was gone for 45 mins and I wanted to slit my wrists while I was driving. Every minute I was away I wanted to bawl my eyes out, and I almost did.

I'm trying not to be over protective, but there is nothing I can do about it. Like about 5 mins ago for instance. I told Littler Tough Army Girl that she could hold him and when she stood up and started walking around with him my heart literally jumped out of my chest and freckin' ran into traffic to jump into an oncoming mac truck and smash into a bunch of tiny bits. Not wanting to freak out I just ignored it and turned back to the computer pretending that I didn't see anything. I mean if Big Tough Smart Army Man isn't worried about it why should I be? But then she walked over to me asking for his plug. I damn near died and calmly asked her to sit back down with him and I will get his bottle. So I went into the bedroom and calmed down. When I came back out she was once again walking around with him. I almost literally passed out. Literally, I'm not joking I grabbed onto the wall for support. Maybe it's cause I'm hungry. Yeah, we'll just say that's it.

nope lets not lie here she is a very over protective mother and I mean very protective.
^BTSAM's two cents^

Go buy some fucking ice cream.

Not that you can get ice cream for two cents anyways.
Maybe some candy.

Or new paint to fix the door he busted down.
Yes that is correct, he busted down a door so the propane guy can fix whatever is leaking in our apartment. That is right, we had a propane leak in our apartment, so they turned our propane off all of today, and now the emergency propane guy is here to fix it and turn it back on. We discovered that it was our oven that was leaking. One of the knobs said it was off, but it wasn't. So it's all fixed now and our hot water doesn't take 5 minutes to heat up. hopefully.

And that is my post. I have a child that is being swallowed up by his receiving blankets and is crying out cause he has the hiccups.

Picture Post Part Duex! Or....not.

I would post more pictures, but for some reason blogger is only letting me do it one at a time and I'm too impatient right now.

I don't feel well.

My throat hurts.
A lot.

By the way that's his "Mom! I have the hiccups again!" face.

I actually think that picture was taken mid-hiccup.

So the poor baby is constipated. And either we've been over feeding him or he's been over feeding himself but he's been spitting up every once in a while. Projectile spitting up.

He cries for a bottle, what are we suppose to do?
BTSAM Says that we have two options, either feed him and take the chance of him keeping it down and gaining weight.

or...

Don't feed him and let him suck on fingers, pacifier, ect. and have him not gain weight.

As much as I hate seeing him upchuck, I like the first option better, it could result in better stuff.

i.e Gaining weight.

Or he's throwing up because he's constipated. It's got to come out somehow right?

I feel bad for him, he poops, it's just hard and he grunts when he's pushing now. Maybe he's been watching Katie Poop to much. Katie Grunts when she poops. Along with kicking tires.

So NASCAR today. Yup I slept from I think lap 72 to about lap 310.
I think.

there were 21 laps left when I woke up.

Jr led about 70 laps I think. Then his car loosened up and he fell back.

He finished 3rd.

It's not first, but he still gets points.

Well I'm going to relax with BTSAM now.

p.s BTSAM wanted me to promote LTAM to LTSAM. So he's gone up in rank now.

Nap Time Ramblings

You know some people think of the strangest things when they are falling asleep.
Like me for instance. Wanna know what I was wondering when I was falling asleep? Don't really care cause I'm going to tell you anyway.

I was thinking about Spongebob Squarepants.

I mean; he works at the Krusty Krab right?
How much does he make? Seriously, he works all the time, and yet we never see him get paid.
And if you have seen at least one episode you know that Mr. Krab is a tight ass when it comes to money, so how does he pay Squidward and Spongebob?

I watched an Episode today that Mr. Krab was tweaking out cause he thought Spongebob had found a penny on the ground and Mr. Krab didn't have one; so he was hell bent on getting that penny from Spongebob, among things he (Mr. Krab) did to acquire this penny was have a penny charity night, a penny movie theater, even asking Spongebob if he could borrow a penny (which resulted in him eventually shaking Spongebob upside down by his feet like a bully and Spongebob's brain falling out and a chase ensued after which Spongebob caught his brain whispered to it and looked at Mr. Krab responding "Bet you didn't know I was a brain whisperer.").

Well if Mr. Krab is so obsessed with money how does Spongebob get paid?
Just think about it. He lives in a Pineapple; how much are those going for now a days? $1.99? How much is his mortgage going for? I'm assuming he has one, and if he does how does he keep up with his bills? On top of feeding Gary? How does he do it?

Well that's it for now.

It's alright.

First of all I would like to state that I only made two bottle really thick, and i watered them down before giving them to him so do not fear.

It's not like a little extra formula wont hurt him anyways.

We went to the doctor today and I am glad to announce that LTAM has gained an Ounce! He now weighs a whooping 4 lbs 14 ounces! An ounce in two days. I think that's not bad. At least he's gaining weight now right?

Poor guy got circumcised today. I almost started crying in the room, they took him from me and brought him to another room and i could still hear him screaming. I almost started crying. I think one tear was shed and then I put my man boots on, and decided that I would save the water works until tonight, when I will just let them take over me, because right now bottling my emotions probably isn't in my best interest, or actually in anyone else's best interest right now either. I'm a walking time bomb at this moment. I've been storing all my emotions from the past week because I don't want anyone to think that I'm a baby.

And everyone can say; 'your not a baby, blah blah blah' but you know what, I don't care. I don't want to seem weak. I looked weak my entire pregnancy because I was a hormonal wreck. I'm tired of being thought of as the cry baby.

No one has come out to say it, but i know that every time I start crying everyone must think 'here we go again' or 'she's such a cry baby.'

That's why I save my cry time for the shower. The hot water makes my face all red, so no one can tell I've been crying.

well now everyone knows huh?

But now my only concern is keeping Jarrid healthy. Everyone out here is sick. Coughing all over the place and then they want to hold Jarrid.

Now is when I'm gonna be the overprotective bitch.

But honestly he cannot get sick, because if he gets this cold that everyone has, we will have a baby in the hospital and everyone will witness me being an emotional wreck. I wouldn't be able to handle seeing him all hooked up to IVs and monitors and crap; not being able to hold my baby would be the worst thing that could happen to me right now. And not being able to make him better just by picking him up and kissing his little cheeks would just kill me and they would probably have to hook me up to monitors too because I would just die. I know right now I wouldn't leave his side until we were bringing him home from the hospital. I probably wouldn't even eat. My health would mean nothing to me at that point. I would have to be dragged out of that hospital kicking and screaming, either that or severely sedated; and that's only if they can get near me with the needle.

Is this me being a psycho mom?

Most likely yes. Maybe that was an exaggeration of everything. Maybe not. I just don't want him getting sick.

That same thing if i got sick, because I wouldn't be able to hold him and it would just kill me. i don't know how BTSAM has done it that past week with holding him only so that I can get a shower in, or to check my e-mail.

His pediatrician said that he has to be back up to his birth weight by his next check up which is on the 11th.

Well American Idol is on, so I'm gonna go watch it.

Hello, I'm Dolly. And you are?

My tits have gotten so freckin' huge it's not even funny.

And on top of that they leak everywhere.

Overshare, i know but I don't really care.
I have some new picture to add!!

BTSAM and LTAM (Little Tough Army Man)

I say being in uniform fits him well.

So we went to the doctors on Monday and LTAM weighed 4 lbs 13 oz. Yeah, he lost weight. Which isn't good so I've gathered. We are suppose to keep him on the high calorie formula we have him on now, and tomorrow we go back to the doctors for him to be circumsized. Yucky.

if she keeps making milk shakes out of his formula he will gain weight very fast once he learns to eat with a spoon.

that is jackson's quick note.

I'm going to bed now. Goodnight everyone. A better post tomorrow.

Breastfeeding Sucks.

Just as I state in the title.
Breastfeeding sucks.
They should make a bumper sticker that says that, cause it's true. I was too early to brag about how surprised I was that breastfeeding was so easy.
Cause I lied.
It's not.
Well it was.
Until we ran into a little problem. We discovered that for some reason Jarrid doesn't like the left twin.
I'm just gonna name them Lavern and Sherley. Why? because I can.
Well I kinda just shrugged it off, if he wasn't feeding off it then no milk would come in; right?
Wrong.
Last night I noticed that something was horribly wrong with my girls.
Well Lavern mostly. Sherley was just having sympathy pains.
BTSAM pointed out that Lavern was significantly bigger then Sherley; And by significantly I mean Sherley was just a cantaloupe, while Lavern is the size of a watermelon. After poking around for a little bit I noticed that Lavern was a bit, well, lumpy. And tender too. Sherley was perfectly fine. A little on the full side, but it wasn't feeding time yet.
I must point out that by 'tender' I mean just looking at her hurt.
I told BTSAM to feel it, cause he's the field medic maybe he knows what is going on. He usually does.
a little side comment: I ate Wendy's for lunch yesterday. Remember that cause it plays into this later.
Now when I poked around Lavern for a little bit I mentioned that I noticed that she was lumpy. In which case she was, there were extremely hard spots the were even more tender to touch. So I reached for my handy dandy Pregnancy Bible, and quickly flipped to the Breastfeeding section. BTSAM said that we need to find a way to drain Lavern cause she was kinda "over full"
I placed my symptoms in the list in the book and found out that it was just really really full. And that all I needed to do was to milk it.
Sounds gross I know.
There was a slight problem with just "milking it" though. It was clogged. Nothing was coming out, that's why Jarrid wouldn't feed off of it. Or so we thought. After sitting on the couch with a heating pad on Lavern for about 15 minutes I started to rub the hard spots, hoping to maybe get them out. Maybe they were just knots, you know?
Good and Bad news comes out of this.
The heating pad got Lavern flowing. So I grabbed a bottle and filled it up.
No sense in wasting perfectly good food.
And by Filled I mean there was a good ounce and a half in the bottle by the time I had stopped. But I felt relieved. Until I touched Lavern again. The lumps were harder. This qualifies as a reason to call the doctor on Monday.
But even more good news, BTSAM and I got Jarrid to feed off the left one. Boy, did it feel good.

On other news we had a better night last night then we did on Friday night, a few tears were shed, but BTSAM told me to take my pain medication and go to bed, He would take care of Jarrid. so I did, this resulted in a few tears being shed for some unknown reason, probably because I was over tired. So I got a good 4 hours of sleep. I woke up at 4 wide awake, checked on Jarrid and decided that it was time for him to eat. So I grabbed a bottle and he ate 1 and a half ounces.
He is currently sleeping, which is something I should be doing.
But I figured I would get a few bottles ready so that when he wakes up later this morning all I have to do is warm them up and give it to him. Maybe it will involve less fussing. I will make another post later this morning with more pictures.